As someone who strategically times lunch and dinner to run into the least amount of people possible, it’s safe to say that my 4:30 p.m. suppers and I have a lot to relay about dining hall etiquette here on campus — or rather, its lack thereof. I personally feel that many of the standards I’m about to discuss should be innate, but, as has been so clearly demonstrated, it might be better if there were a solid list of guidelines for all of us to collectively adopt to ensure a more pleasant dining experience.
The dining hall is a place of organization and efficiency. No one should have to endure physically colliding with someone because of what seems to be a general disregard for the basic flow of traffic. Just like any other road or walkway, people walking on the right side should be going one direction, and people walking on the left should be going the opposite. There is no reason that someone’s steaming bowl of ramen should end up on the floor, on themselves, or worse, on somebody else. The awkward “Excuse me” and gruesome navigation of the criminally long Wing Wednesday lines could all be avoided if we simply followed a standard flow of traffic. Stay on your side of the traffic flow and everything will be a lot easier.
One thing about the dining hall is that there is a lot to say about the lack of respect for personal space. Hovering over someone as they discern what soup to put in their ramen or what vegetables they want in their stir-fry is an almost guarantee that the experience will be as minimally pleasant as possible for all parties involved. I promise that standing three inches behind someone as they decide what toppings they want will not make the line go any faster. Let’s all try to adopt some patience in our lives and give people even a small degree of grace. It is sometimes this suffocating atmosphere of pressure that causes someone to panic and add mushrooms to their omelets (which, by the way, is inexcusable on its own).
That being said, it’s also important to keep in mind that we do not in fact have all day. Let’s not hold the line up because we didn’t think to use the duration of the time we were impatiently standing in line to consider what we wanted. Scrolling through Fizz can wait until after we have mentally made our decisions and prepared for our turns.
Another note on taking into consideration the value of personal space: Let’s give some to the people who clearly want it. If someone has their whole Apple ecosystem out on a table — with their AirPods on and Apple Pencil in hand — chances are they would prefer to be sitting alone. Leave a reasonable gap between you and the other people at your table. I’m all for making new friends, but, as charming as a dining hall meet-cute sounds, it’s also important to assess the vibe. The last thing an overstimulated person drowning in work wants is the sounds of chewing echoing through their ears or awkward eye contact as they take a bite of their burger.
I am a big believer that the dining hall could be a place of friendliness and organization if we all implement small changes. It’s less about rules and more about respect. Let’s respect each other, the cleanliness of our hall and, most importantly, the poor dining hall employee who has to refill the ketchup dispenser 42 times a day.
